I been through the desert on a horse with no name,

Wow. I don't know where to start. I feel shitty, to say the least.

I'm trying to stay positive but I am so pissed that my whole vacation was wasted on endless coughing, blowing my nose, and now 2 ear infections AND a sinus infection. excuse my language, but how the FUCK does that happen? that is so sucky. I can't even begin on how much I DON'T wanna be in school. I did have some great times on my vacation, regardless of my shitty shitty sickness that won't ever end.

I'm also very enraged at this so-called "doctor" I had on friday who "diagnosed" me with nothing, ultimately. She was extremely unintelligent. I'm pretty sure I told her my ear felt blocked and my nose was producing a color that was prone to infection. However, she told me all that was wrong was "some blockage" and I needed a NASAL SPRAY. ya know, simple stuff, she preached that it works miracles and got my hopes up very high. After discovering this obviously didn't work, the annoying-ness that is my blocked ear developed. I call this so-called "doctor" and she tells me it's a SIDE EFFECT of the NASAL SPRAY. Seriously?! There is no fucking way that is possible, even in medicine. So, I basically told my mom if it's not better by Monday then I'm going to a different doctor. 'Nuff said.

Long story short, some fake doctor bitch told me that all I needed was nasal spray when I had actually developed 2 ear infections and a sinus infection. Fuckin' bitches go to doctor school for most of their young lives and diagnose a fuckin' ear infection wrong. Bitchbitchbitch. I am not happy. But I am trying to be. I guess that's a start :/

I will now proceed to pout and sit at home and work on things I don't want to do for a school I don't want to go to, especially in my weakened state, but whatever. Fuck it, I'm done. As optimistic as I am, even this will not bring me 100% downhill. I am hostile and angry and upset and no one understands how it feels to be obsolete. Because, surprisingly, that's what this sickness feels like. It feels like I am completely trapped inside my own head and I can't talk to anyone without gasping for breath, because I can't breathe out of my nose, and I can't hear out of my left ear, and I can't move my head without all this shitty junk sloshing around in there, and it SUCKS. I also can't enjoy my food, because since I am so clogged in all parts of my head/nose, I can't taste. So there you have it, that's me trying to be optimistic.

Surprised it's not working? Try being me right now. As selfish as it may sound, this really does suck. I can't even kiss my boyfriend for a minute without gasping for breath and pushing him away for clear air to breathe in. THIS BLOWS.

Eh, if it doesn't get better I will plan to pull a Van Gogh and just get rid of the ear.

Who needs it, anyways?

Goodbye, Blogger!